Oldie but Goodie

Once again, I am recycling an old email while I gather new material for a fresh brand new blog coming soon to a blog near you....

This is an email to my sister Rita (she wanted me to change her name to protect her innocence). Ok, I'll humor her. She wanted me to ask my father a few questions for this book she picked up where you ask the "subject" a bunch of questions about themselves, about things they remember and because she lives in California or lets say Oregon for the sake of this blog, she wanted me to ask the questions during Thanksgiving Dinner. As for the leaf blower...someone wanted to buy my father a leaf blower for his birthday or some occasion where you give people stuff. Enjoy,,,

Dear Jeanette,

Thank you ever so much for giving me the really, really hard questions for Dad, he’ll be sobbing all over his turkey remembering first his happiest day and then the fact that it was so long ago and realize how old he’s getting, only to be bombarded with another question, what was your saddest? Now his turkey is drenched and completely inedible and the cranberry sauce is running into the mashed potatoes making it look like a bloody snowy battlefield. Bamm, we’re back in Korea…..no stopping now…. Here we might as well tied Dad up, bare foot, to the back of a car and dragged him down memory lane, leaving chunks of skin every ¼ mile or so….all for the sake of us having a lovely little book with his deepest most treasure memories so we could read it and laugh, sob or whatever. Absolutely no problem though, I’ll be sure to ask the questions.

Test date is 12/11 but can be postponed, if need be…..I’m going to try & avoid that, but it’s not looking very promising cause I’m just plain tired and work is sucking the life out of me and the holidays are coming and there is cat fur stuck to my kitchen floor so it looks like a shag carpet, but only in select spots. I’m up to my arse, no way past my arse, in laundry and the cat litter boxes are getting ready to just up and walk away. However, they are handy when you want to clear your sinuses out. Just walk up stairs and you slammed with this foul awful smell and you realize, WOW I can breathe again, then you realize, Holy Mother of GOD…I CAN BREATHE AGAIN AND I WISH I COULDN'T’T!!!!

As far as the leaf blower, good idea when you are just dealing with leaves, but he’s got the Acorns from Hell. You start blowing those around and it’s World War I all over again. I can see Gruter coming out to check out what the heck is hitting his house and scrambling to get back into the house when he realizes Bill is out of control with the leaf blower and can’t be stopped, not because he doesn’t want to, believe me he does, but the force of the air coming out of the thing is so strong it’s preventing him from standing and all the while he is still blowing leaves, with Acorns, like machine gun fire all over the neighborhood and Gruter screaming to get back into his house, because Doris locked him out. Bill is just waiting for the damn thing to run out of gas.

With that, I will end this rant. I do believe I have had way too much coffee.

Night,
Love always,
Mary